As my kids are getting older, I am starting to notice the difference in raising your kids in a large city and a small town.
I was raised in a small town and am now raising my children in a big city.
I grew up in the same town with both sets of grandparents, many of my aunts, uncles, and cousins who were really just extra siblings. My parents met in 2nd grade and were High School sweethearts. My friend's parents all grew up with my parents. During my school days, I had teachers that were my parent's teachers, some of my teachers went to church with my grandma and some of them attended the church my family attended.
Your worlds collide a lot when you live in a small town.
I knew every single person in my graduating class of 185 ish. I grew up with them. Kindergarten- 12th grade. I have memories of almost all of them, be it through the classroom, church, cheerleading, choir, or any other activity I was involved in. We were all together-all the time.
When you live in a small town, it is rare to not run into someone you know and there is an unspoken pressure to "keep your nose clean."
There is an old proverb about living in a small town that goes:
"You can not fart without the whole town smelling it." -Unknown
Wow, such wisdom.
When you grow up in a small town, everything is a big deal! Senior Night, High School Graduation Open Houses, Prom, Wedding Showers, Weddings, and Baby Showers are comparable to The Emmy's or The Governor's Ball.
Dresses are fancier, hair is bigger, cars are newer, and you just better keep up.
At a young age, it is known that you are to be involved in everything. Gymnastics, cheerleading, dance, soccer, t-ball, little league, swimming, and whatever else on the planet that there is to offer.
Parents are more tempted to compete with other parents to win the title of "My Kid is Better Than Your Kid Award," or, perhaps, try to accomplish the things they didn't get a chance to accomplish in their own childhood and use their children as opportunities to do so.
(For the record: This is a blanket temptation for any parent wherever you live-it is just more visible when you live in a small town. Everyone is watching!)
On the other hand, raising our kids in a big city has been an adjustment as well. Nobody knows who you are and you don't know who they are. There is no pressure to ever put make up on or get involved in anything because nobody knows you exist.
Your kids will get invited to spend time with a friend from school and you will have no idea who the child is or who their parents are.
It's scarier to live in a big city. People get murdered more... like 100% more. Kids are not safe to stand at the bus stop alone and it is tempting not to let your kids leave the house for any reason in order to ensure their safety.
Dances, sports, and any other extra curricular activity is more expensive and there is no real pressure to attach your identity to what you do after school. Popular kids are not always athletes or even the best looking kid in school. In fact, popularity is not the same thing in a large city school as it is in a small town school.
Big city kids are happy to have a few friends because it is impossible to know everyone in your class.
Parents aren't competing with each other on a school level but rather, they compete with themselves and their idea of what perfection looks like.
You can probably see that there are benefits to growing up in either scenarios. I love my little town and all the personalities that make up that home sweet home community that I call mine. I am who I am today because of the small town culture where I was raised AND something that I have learned through this big city living is that it is less important WHAT we are involved in and more important WHO we become.
Parents, whether you are raising your kids in a small town or a big city, always we keep WHO you are raising more important that WHAT they are involved in.
WHO > what
That's funny.
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